Anytime I've ever wanted to learn a secret family recipe there has always been some sort of price to pay for learning the wisdom of generations' passed. This recipe is no different, and in some ways the "price" was more exacting than other secret recipes I've learned.
My friend Cristina... the resident Italian of this blog :) taught me how to make her father's famed hot peppers. What Cristina forgot to mention was that you need to have an industrial sized bottle of hydrocortizone and an equally large bottle of grain alcohol and/or whole milk on hand (I suggest both... and I'll explain why later).
Preparation is key... one word... gloves: leather, latex, mittens it doesn't matter just wear gloves. Another thing you may want to consider is a Slap Chop (insert royalty payment here).
Only use fresh peppers, nothing dried, and try to find peppers that complement each other. If you go with something spicy like a jalapeno or habanero, pair it with something a little less intense like a poblano or anaheim. Cristina and I ended up with 200 jalapeno and red finger peppers, both of which are very spicy! Also, while you're at the store you'll need lots of olive oil and salt, and some jars.
Wash and dry your peppers, DRYING is key. I became very intimate with the concept that water makes capsaicin burn worse, so take my word for it DRY your peppers.
Next grab a collander and place it in a larger bowl. This is the point where you'd want to dawn your protective gloves, and for Cristina and I, this is the point where we paid the "price"...
Chop the peppers to a fine dice. Cut off the stem, split the pepper down the middle, juliene, and dice; seeds and all (except the stem) go into the collander. Once you have a layer, you'll want to sprinkle enough salt to coat the layer. Repeat until all the peppers are layered and salted. Yell something in Italian and leave it aside (but not in the fridge) for a few hours or overnight. Periodically you'll want to return and pour out the water that drained from the peppers.
Once the peppers release most of their water, you're ready to go. Take your jars and pack as much pepper as you can into it while leaving just a little room to pour in your olive oil. When pouring in the olive oil you'll want to make sure that it gets into every crevice. I just pushed the peppers around with a fork to make sure the oil seeped in. Make sure that the olive oil covers the peppers all the way to the top or you'll get mold buildup in the jar. Once you've done this, the mixture will only get better with age. You can use it as a topping on a variety of different things... I really like it with brown rice (per Cristina's recommendation).
Make note, you'll want to refill the mixture with olive oil or pack down the peppers everytime you use it to ensure that they remain covered by the olive oil.
So remember that hydrocortizone, grain alcohol, and whole milk I told you about? If you're daring (or stupid enough) to cut 200 peppers without gloves (which we did) or you happen to touch your face or other sensitive areas of your body (which I did)... you'll want these remedies on hand. I have to commend Marianne, nurse extraodinaire, for saving our lives.
My experience...
About 1/3 of the way through cutting the peppers, I told Cristina that my hands were tingling. This tingle grew to a burning sensation, which eventually graduated to full blown inferno on my right hand. Cristina, being the stronger soul in our group, finished chopping the peppers and then joined me in the pain bonanza. So we started pouring milk all over our hands. I'm pretty sure I scared my neighbors, who saw me crying with milk dribbling down my arms. Regardless of how much milk we used, the sensation kept returning, and lasted well into the next day.
If this happens to you, soak your hands in either a high proof grain alcohol or whole milk for 30 minutes (per nurse's instructions). I suggest using the whole milk, while taking swigs of the grain alcohol with your free hand. Afterwards, slather your hand with hydrocortizone and keep doing so over and over and over again.
Things not to do:
- Rub your eyes
- Pet your cat
- Go to the bathroom
- Hug your grandmother
- Learn the skill of facial recognition through touch (that thing blind people do)
For all the pain, it was well worth it. The hot pepper mixture is great, and it lasts for a long time if preserved properly. It goes well with a number of things. Give it a shot... if you dare :)